There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
