it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
