Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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