yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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