Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD