i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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