I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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