She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize