i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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