She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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