how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
