Me. At least after what I've been through.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
