I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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