Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
