Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
