So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
