seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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