the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize