Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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