I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
