You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
