He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
