in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
