STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
