She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
