I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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