I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Who did Billy Mays play for?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
