Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
