It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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