its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize