so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
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That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
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I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
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