Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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