You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
