i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
