Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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