I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
