did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
