We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You took a bar mat shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize