Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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