we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
