I wish I could punch you in the face.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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