Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
