My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
