We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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