Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
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The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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