this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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