I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
