Will you blow on my dice?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
