is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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