Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
