Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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